Tuesday, 16 November 2004

An Open Letter To Super Parma

Here's a letter I wrote to the friendly folk at the Super Parma website.

Hey Super Parma Dudes,

My name is Jeremy Young and I am a long time lurker first time writer. I am just writing to describe some parma experiences that some friends and I have had.

Last night a few workmates and I were in Richmond attending a gig at the Corner Hotel. Before heading down to Richmond, we knew we had to grab a bite to eat, so we decided to do some research on the definitive parma encyclopedia of www.superparma.com.

We checked out the "Parma Specials" section of your website, and noted that the Richmond Club Hotel had a Monday night special of a $10.00 Pot 'n' Parma. Clicking on the link, we subsequently discovered that you had rated the Richmond Club Hotel parma an impressive 16/20, so all was looking good -- we would going to get a good bargain parma, a free pot, some great music. The night was looking up!

Imagine our disappointment when we arrived at the said hotel and discovered that the special of the night was a steak sandwich and pot for $10.00! We didn't have a laptop handy, so we couldn't check out www.supersteaksandwich.com. We decided quickly that even though we weren't going to get the bargain we were hoping for, we would try the parma anyway -- after all, the standard price was only $13 which was pretty cheap anyway. Unfortunately the hotel was pretty packed and they said there would be a 50 minute wait for meals -- 50 minutes we didn't have. So we decided to take a raincheck and return at some other time (hopefully on a Tuesday night when the real special was on). I guess the fact that it was packed out is a pretty good sign. Anyway, please update your website and move the special for this hotel to Tuesday night -- we don't want to see other disappointed folk turning up on Monday night expecting a bargain basement parma.

Luckily, we had a contingency plan from the start, and we noted that another pub in Richmond had a Monday night pot 'n' parma special -- The Vaucluse. We did recall that you guys had only given this a 12.5/20, but we weren't in any position to find another place at this time, so we decided to settle for merely a "good" parma.

When we received our parmas, we noticed that the chicken "breast" was a perfect heart shape -- it was obvious that this was manufactured processed chicken. Of course, you can deep fry anything and it will taste good, but that's missing the point of what a chicken parma stands for -- a chicken parma should be made from a REAL chicken breast.

Which takes me to my next point. I notice that you have only allocated 3 points to "quality of meat" in your ratings. On the other hand, I notice you have allocated 5 points to the size of the parma, and 4 points to the quality of the SAUCE. Now this may be a very controversial comment, but don't you think that the quality of the meat is more important than the sauce and the size of the parma? I mean sauce is very integral to the whole parma experience, but it's not called a PARMA chicken, it's a CHICKEN parma. The chicken forms the root of the whole parma experience, and because of this, I think the chicken should be allocated more points than the sauce. And what's the point of having a HUGE parma if the quality of the chicken is poor? Anyway, just personal opinion. But I'd be interested to know your rationale in coming up with the weighting of the points when rating parmas.

Also, a few notes about the chicken parma at the Burvale in Forest Hill. It truly is a horrendous parma -- you have to try it. It is an insult to everything a parma stands for. I guess my unflattering comments aren't going to make you rush out to Forest Hill to try it, but as the experts in the domain of chicken parmas, it should be your duty to inform people of the parmas to avoid just as much as it is to inform people of the superb culinary experiences. Finally, another note about the special at the Burvale, the price has moved up to $6, and it's only a Friday LUNCHTIME special, not a Friday DINNER special. So please update your website to indicate this. Not that anyone should really be eating the Burvie parma at all (or anything from the Burvie mind you). That place needs to be avoided like the plague.

All in all, great website, and keep up the great work!


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